Coworkers and those who want to slap them!

Ok so I very luckily landed a great job that I love. The people are awesome, it's a startup environment (though with actual money behind it) and a great product. At the same time I was hired, a woman I'll call Audra was also hired. She's the same age as my mom - that's cool, whatever. She obviously had to have some kind of skills in customer service or inside sales because she has NO computer skills at all. None. Nada. Can use email, can use Word (barely) and can do little more than type a column of numbers in Excel. Now at this job we use a CRM tool called salesforce.com. And we use it extensively - every day, all day. She has NO experience using this tool and let me tell you - fuckups abound. We've been there almost 90 days and every day it is something else - she cannot get one order out the door without it being wrong. Not all her fault, surely, but every single customer has a problem. And it's all a big drama deal every time. So she literally cannot get her day to day work done because she puts out fires all day. So I do all the extra sales work, extra accounting work that has to get done, invoicing, special projects, all of it. She does not do one extra thing to help. And any time there is something to be done after hours - she can't make it for some reason. She likes to pull the "old lady" card and I told her to knock it off. That's reverse ageism and if she wants to be treated like everyone else stop saying that. But that's all she's stopped saying. She fucking talks fucking constantly - just yapppppping about nothing in particular and everything in general. And when she gets nervous or excited, she's a fucking fishwife - a shrew. I can't stand it. It's a small place and we are in cubes but I'm ready to kill her. STFU already I'm trying to work! Maybe she's losing her hearing? I have no idea but I have to shush her, like 10 times a day.

And another thing! She calls her boss for the smallest of questions. I would say she calls him no less than 6 times a day. I can go 3 days without talking to my boss - helps he is in a remote office somewhere...but my god the guy is a salesman, he doesn't have time for the piddly shit she calls him about.

We were pretty much expected to be on our own in about 2 weeks and I've mastered the job easily and am looking to do more things within the company but my god if I have to sit next to her for the next 4 years before IPO I am going to lose my shit.

She's a nice lady but can't keep up and should have just stayed where she was.